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28 March 2021, 17:54

Back in November I matched with a guy on an app and we hit it off. The area I live in has been under lockdown since November but things have started opening back up. Over the past 4 months we've had virtual dates and talk daily and had plans to meet up once lockdown lifted. On my profile I stated I wanted a relationship and he mentioned that he wanted the same thing so while getting to know each other we discussed the qualities we look for in a relationship and in someone we are dating. Over the past month or so, I noticed some minor red flags. Lockdown restrictions have lifted and he asked me if it wasn't for lockdown would I still be seeking a relationship or more of a casual arrangement (he has a history of casual relationships). There were 2 occasions where he didn't text me for a few days without any explanation, and I'd always have to be the one arranging our video calls. He also told me a story of how he had a one night stand while in a relationship but never told his ex gf. Given all of these things, last week I asked him if he was too busy to be in a relationship. He said no, but then yesterday night he send me a text basically saying he's ready to date but not be in a relationship as he wouldn't have the time, and with things opening he wouldn't know what a relationship would look like that he's willing to keep his options open and see where things go. I was pretty shocked considering we've talked for months on end and he didn't consider these things while talking? I told him that at this point in my life I'm looking for more commitment and maybe we should just remain friends, and he told me he was disappointed and that it was bittersweet but he understands. He said that maybe now is not the time for him to be in a relationship and that he worries that he may not meet someone's expectations.

Why did it take him 5 months to determine this - especially when it was time to meet up now that lockdown is over? I feel sad but I know it was the right decision.

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28 March 2021, 17:54

Been texting this guy back and forth everyday. We haven’t had a date yet but he’s mentioned that we should “hangout next week” though he hasn’t made concrete plans with a time and place. He has asked me to meet up before but it was pretty much always for the next day or so and I told him that I already have plans but let’s plan something ahead of time.

As for the texting, when the conversation naturally dies he has not initiated the following time. I have initiated texting maybe 2 days later to get another conversation going.

I don’t think I should have to initiate this early in the game especially to make finalized date plans. What do you think?

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26 March 2021, 14:41

There are three powerful ways to speed your path to love—right now! Each of these things changes your future in love, helps you grow into a fuller expression of the person you are meant to be, and deepens your capacity for true intimacy. Try them right now and watch what happens!


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26 March 2021, 14:41

5 days ago I gave a guy my number. He texted me later and we were texting back and forth without a beat. Recently he’s been very dry and inconsistent. He has multiple jobs so I’m fine with the inconsistency but sometimes he starts conversations and doesn’t finish or continue them and i’m left looking stupid. He doesn’t ask me any questions because he’s not comfortable yet. (Doesn’t make sense to me bc how else would you get to know someone especially over text???) He’s busy so I usually don’t bother waiting for a text but I’m starting to think he just doesn’t like me (despite him telling me he does). I asked my guy friends and they said when they meet a girl they like and have her number they’ll make time to text them no matter what. I don’t wanna waste my time so much so I told him if he doesn’t like me he can just tell me and I’ll be off his back but HE decided he wants to get to know each other more. I’ll try to talk to him more irl but I’m starting to think he has lost interest. What do you guys think?

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26 March 2021, 14:41

To be completely honest, I've only pursued men who I wanted, not who wanted me back (in any other way besides sexually that is). When it comes to men that have shown interest, I'm not in anyway interested. To me, I have this set type of person that I want and when I find that, I don't want to let it go.

Ehh this is holding me back. I want to open myself up to different types of people, but not in a way where it feels like I have to settle just to be with someone. In that case, I'd rather be single for a much longer time.

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24 March 2021, 14:53
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Even though no contact is the best way to get your ex back, at times it's necessary to break it and contact your ex. Dating/relationship expert Lucia reveals the 10 situations where you should break no contact and reach out to your ex.

24 March 2021, 14:53
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There's many variables that affect whether or not you'll get your ex back. However, there's one factor that trumps everything else. Dating/relationship expert Lucia reveals the #1 thing that determines whether your ex will come back or stay away forever.

Sign up for coaching at:  http://www.theartoflove.net/coaching

24 March 2021, 14:52
What are single women thinking? Today, Kait Warman is joined by Carrie Lloyd and Kat Harris for a single women roundtable where they all discuss various topics from a single woman's perspective.
24 March 2021, 14:52

On this week’s episode we welcome Alexi Pappas, an award-winning writer, filmmaker, and Olympic athlete who wrote the new book "Bravey: Chasing Dreams, Befriending Pain, and Other Big Ideas." We talk about mental health and how she found help after struggling following the 2016 Olympics and her inspiring life, career and journey. Then we answer your listener questions including one listener who feels like she’s her boss’s therapist and another listener who is newly dating someone struggling with their mental health. In the news we discuss making friends during a pandemic & another stupid gender reveal goes wrong. 

This week's episode is brought to you by:

Organifi (offer code: THISISWHY)

Advertise on This Is Why via Gumball.fm

24 March 2021, 14:52

What's up, i've been seeing a few posts around where people are struggling with date ideas during the pandemic so i've got a small list of idea's that i've thought might be fun and fairly cheap!

• Build the ultimate bed fort • Photography date • Active beach day • Go to old ruins and abandoned places • Visit lesser known parts of the UK (or wherever you live) • Classic hot tub and cabin getaway • City hide and seek/treasure hunt • Food tour • Comedy club night • Art events/classes • Cooking classes

Thanks for reading! I hope i can inspire one of you guys to have a fun day weather it's a first date or your 100th!

P.s. The photography date idea was a hit when i did it, we went to the zoo and took a bunch of cool pics!!

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